Wednesday, 16 December 2009

computer withdrawls

I haven't died.

My laptop's got a broken screen and I've no money to repair it, so I'll have to wait until I can borrow a computer for a real, juicy, satisfying update.

In the meantime, I've been reading Mutants by Armand Marie Leroi, which covers the history of medically documented "mutants" and human genetic variety. There is a chapter on osteosarcoma that is particularly fascinating. Apparently there is a correlation with height, growth hormone, and propensity for rampant bone cell growth. More on that later...

I've been having pain in my left leg and pelvis again, and it feels exactly how it felt 2 years ago, before I was diagnosed. It gets worse at night. It gets worse mid-month. I can practically mark my calendar. My onc says not to worry, but that's what they told me pre dx, too. I really, really, really think it has something to do with my hormones. Every doctor I've ever spoken to assumes I'm wrong, and yet no one can give me an explanation.

Maintaining a "normal" "successful" quality of life with disease is effing near impossible. I feel exhausted and broken-down every night, the consequence of trying to make it work. har har.

more later my lovelies.

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